google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
