Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
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