I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
