i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
