I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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