I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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