Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
