He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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