you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
