I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
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