I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Randomize
