You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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