I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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