so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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