This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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