I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
