god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
