No awkward lesbian experiences without me
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
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