i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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