just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
