My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
