guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
