..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
I'm really busy with my period
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