why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
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