hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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