i think i have herpe
just one?
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
