i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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