Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
