She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I'm jealous of your bromance
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
