i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Randomize
