my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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