I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
