its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
