I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
