I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
