she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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