I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
