how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
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