i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
