if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
