Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
