EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
