i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Blood and glitter go together right?
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
