I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
