Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
