As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Randomize
