don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
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