But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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