she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
