Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize